Friday, July 21, 2006

INHIBITIONS

after a candle lit
dinner for two
you stop to swap bodily fluids...but
not like you used to,

this time it's test tubes...
blood, a little bit of piss, some stool...it's two thousand six...
and we're all grown up now.

so you offer
a blueprint for the
disease ridden...pause here...(that's right)
public swimming pool you invite me to...and it
relates to your entire family’s
medical history...metaphorically of course,
but i still pick up on it.

which means,

that instead of throwing caution,
we tend to offer up something else
to the wind.

but the gods somehow know it's half assed,
not true, strangely misinterpreted.

hamburger helper
instead of human sacrifice...and
(hold on a second in this moment) while

romance dies inside
the tinker-tape parade
of political correctness...and yes,

your mind plays music for itself...a tiny
little song...as if it were a game;

and to win,

you'd have to feel better
about yourself.

which is to say
that knowing something is right
makes us all feel more
like a man
each time
that we're a part of it,

causing us all to be
a little older, which in turn
we might go as far
as saying...(not to be conceded)

less afraid.

because in this life
you have to decide what
you're willing to own...willing
to consume a section of yourself...
to compromise, and

even if that ends up
putting the 'hit' back into "in hit bition,"

you still have to consummate
any relationship with a clean
bill of health. always while

trying desperately
to pretend as if you didn't just see
a green light shimmer,
a checkered flag wave, or so much as
airplane batons
motioning you in to land.

all of these things
which in your scorched mind scream
"let's fuck my darling!
for the love of god can we fuck?"

...but you haven't met her yet...
and why is it wrong to just snuggle?

...i'll always know that it's amazing...
maybe it's because i'm matt...who is
honestly becoming a man...
(but secretly it's because i'm badass)

it's only life...and there's
no way in hell that i'm done
living it quite yet!

why not fall in love with it
for the mean time?

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